Friday, June 20, 2008

Kimbo Slice vs. Mike Tyson



The Stats:

Name: Kimbo Slice
Height: 6 ft 2 in (1.88 m)
Weight: 240 lb (110 kg/17 st)

Name: Mike Tyson
Height: 5 ft 11.5 in (1.82 m)
Weight: Somewhere in the ballpark of 223 lbs

Ace's Prediction:

First off, if your unaware of who Kimbo Slice is, I suggest you relinquish the uninformed douche that lurks inside you and type "Kimbo Slice" into youtube. I warn you however, the next 15 minutes of your life will be consumed by barbaric, relentless beatings the likes of which you have never witnessed before.

In terms of my projection, to be completely honest, I wouldn't even want to be within the same state borders that housed a contest between these two psychopaths. But with that said, assuming Tyson was in his prime (as Slice is now) I'd have to give the thumbs up to Iron Mike; Chiefly because "Kid Dynamite" had zero qualms in raping the dickens out of Miss Rhode Island - Disree Washington - back in '91. Not to mention his declared bankruptcy despite receiving over 30 mm for several of his fights. This overt irresponsibility and negligence, in concert with his general nutbag demeanor, lets me further know that Tyson is in fact out of his fucking mind; let alone his proven appetite for body parts.

Whereas the opposition, Mr. Slice, has a family and kids that he wholeheartedly supports. Or as he put it in one of his youtube videos, "This is how I put food on my family's muhfuckin' table!".



Your my boy Mike.

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