Obama Smokes Cigs: Don't give an eff. And if I had to stomach Hillary Rodham everyday I'd be injecting the nicotine directly into my skull.
Chris Brown, sentencing: Dear America, beat your wife publicly, leak naked pics of her online, come out with a song called "its not my fault", make millions. Yours Truly, C Breez.
Operator, text messaging, that caused train collision in DC: It's called bbm sister.
John & Kate + 8, divorce: To this day, I have no idea who you are. But know this, I hate you two and your litter.
Los Scandolous, Los Angeles: kinda clever.
Chef's Question on Whether or Not there's anything that can be done to avoid questionable toilet water splashing back up into your ass when pinching a loaf: .....No
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